Dandileons and my cancer anniversary

Cancer anniversary means different things to different people.

No. As far as I know, dandelions do not cause or cure cancer. This is a different kind of  tale – about seasons in nature and seasons in the cancer journey, about anniversaries and memories. A tale that is bitter sweet. When the lump in my breast blossomed so did dandelions around me, too.  Now spring is in full bloom again. No day is like the next. More colours, more fibrany. The ice cream van has been back for some weeks. The grass in the parks is getting cut, the distance between the trees is shrinking as the space gets filled out with lushous green.  Dandileons are everywhere. Bright and deep yellow and orange. Leaves and roots are bitter and good for you.

As children we cut the stems, put them in water, and they would curl up into weird and wonderful shapes. We would try and sell them to passers by. Now I eat the leaves and the stems. If I am brave I add some burdock leaves, which takes me right up to my bitter taste threshold. But it’s seasonal detox.

My cancer was diagnosed in the month of May. I had found a lump in my right breast in April. Treatment started in July. In some ways that was detox,  cleansing, cutting out and killing off – the bad with the good, because the chemo did not discriminate.  That’s some time ago now. Thankfully, I am well – as far as I can tell, for now.

Since then nature’s seasons have become more important to me. I pay more attention, and feel myself part of a greater scheme.  I make a conscious effort to take part, to eat seasonal food, to grow plants and attend to them across the seasons and a lot more. We dress according to the seasons and our lifestyles are adjusted, too. But often we leave it at that.

Feeling connected to naturs is important to me, and I feel better for it. It is mental, emotional and physical medicine. Otherwise the risk is, that everything becomes about cancer, potential illness, suffering, and dying. Otherwise there is the real risk, that I look at the seasons in nature through the lense of my cancer seasons: Spring is about check ups and diagnosis; summer, autumn and winter is about treatment and hopefully survival – until the next spring.  It may sound crazy, but the trauma of diagnosis, treatment and uncertainty is pretty compelling stuff.

When I feel torn inside and pulled towards doubt and fear of what might happen, going into nature and being part with all my senses offers grounding and some peace.  It certainly heals something inside and strengthens the soul.  It works for me. Everyone to their own.

Dandileons and cancer in May, they now go together, my attempt at detox and the cancer check up season – bitter sweet.

You might also be interested in other posts about cancer.

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